Still confused.

Maybe the post was right.. Maybe I do need to figure out what I want? I've thought a lot about it and still have no real idea. A companion. Someone to have fun with and be intimate with. Someone to confide in and not be shy with. Maybe I just want someone to make me feel as special as all of my friends seem to feel with their boyfriends?

I guess I could just be shy? Maybe I just read too many romance novels and have my expectations set so high that no one will ever really measure up. Is it possible that I learned too much from other peoples relationships? I never thought that it was possible until I reviewed my life. I watched my sister get burned horribly by a few bad relationships. I'm always the one everyone comes to with their relationship horror stories. I seem to be the one everyone comes to for advice when I have no real experience. Can you really give good advice without having any experience? I apparently seem to since I work as the 'mom' with all of my friends.

I still don't understand. I'm hit on constantly at work.. and I work at a hotel! Maybe I'm not really putting myself out there, since I've never taken any of them up on the offer (they're at a hotel and asking the desk clerk out..I'm sure that will lead to something other than a few too many drinks and getting asked up to their room). I am sorta shy and come across as mildly bitchy sometimes. I suppose those two things alone could ward off guys. Maybe I seem slutty? I don't really wear that much make up and I don't have some huge tits to show off so I don't really think that's the case. Maybe I reek of the 'desperate for someone' scent? I don't know anymore. I'm still baffled by my forever single status.

Oh, and my pictures are totally random.. depending on my mood I just pic one from the ginormous stash I have taken over the last couple of years. A lot of them are from my summers in Alaska. Some are just from being stupid at home or from vacations and some.. are just random pretty things I thought I would share.